Don't cry

LOVE seems to change so easily,
In place of our own greed, a painful scar is left,
Gotta let you go
And please don’t cry
I guess I was not really the person for you
I couldn’t hold back my stupid heart
Which pained you
And please don’t cry
Here is the end for the both of us,
And until the world would allow our love then,
It’s okay baby please don’t cry,
This long journey is about to end.
But someday, we will meet again,
In the next life, we will see each other again
Everyday, we are blinded by our anger,
What we were fighting about every minute,
I cried every night,
Baby I cried
All the long nights
I stayed up late crying,
I spent them all alone
Baby I cried
Here is the end for the both of us,
And until the world would allow our love then,
It’s okay baby please don’t cry,
This long journey is about to end.
But someday, we will meet again,
In the next life, we will see each other again
Sometimes, when tears come to me,
I remember our beautiful memories
I hope that you won’t be hurt more,
And please don’t cry
It’s okay baby please don’t cry,
This long journey is about to end.
But someday, we will meet again,
In the next life, we will see each other again

P.S: another beautiful melody. =) The lyrics are so real. 

What goes wrong?

Why human can change their personality so much just after a couple of time?
Jane who used to smile and laugh everyday, now just left a expressionless face.
No one seems to know what Jane thinking about now.
Even though her close friends.
I can't figure out whether Jane changed, or her friends changed.
They were a group of girls who share secrets to each other and tell all the feeling towards them.
They didn't quarrel before. For the past 4 years.
But then, when a lots of things happened at the same times,
It has the power to changed a person.
Study, Family, Love, and Result just keep on stressing Jane.
She wants to get freedom so badly form this cruel world.
Jane was a hardworking girl, and has leadership.
She was the one who make decision for her friends when they face problems.
Maybe Jane was too perfect in her friend's eyes, so soon her friends will think nothing will let Jane down.
But, it was just too wrong.
When Jane needed help from her friends, she rarely speak out to them.
Of course, her friends won't realize it.
Jane soon become tired, she need to do many many things by herself.
Jane slowly close her heart to her friends, don't tell her friends about anything.
Jane did a lot of weird things to her friends. Things like to a stranger or enemy.
Her friends can't get what she trying to tell them and misunderstand happened.
Now they can't talk happily to each other. Everyone seems like has their own secret in their heart.
Friend A don't trust Friend B anymore. Friend B think Friend A just leaving her further and further.
And slowly, this group gonna break to pieces.
Jane's friends try to talk to her, but she just left with no reply and answer.
Her friends really do hope the best friend relationship between Jane and them will be there forever and ever.
Don't because of own feelings and started leaving each other.
This will just become a joke to THEM. The evil groups.
Jane's friend don't wanna them be like THEM, who act like a best friend to another, but talk about the bad thing behind of the friend.
PLEASE! Don't be like that. =(

Time passed and won't be back.

Time passed faster than you can expect.

It just goes though and you can't even beg time to stop for you.

When happy moment, you hope the time can just stop.

But when sad moment, you just want the time pass as fast as it can.

But time won't give even a shit to you.

Talk about the past three years of school life and special things happened in my life with Ming.

Actually I feel like crying when I talking with Ming.

I controlled it, by playing my phone, just to distract my mind.

Ming, doesn't realize that right? =)

Still talk about you like it was yesterday.

From happy to sad, then happy again.

I realized that there were a lot of things happened between us.

But most of them can make me smile easily.

Just some small action, some words, some chat.

HAHAHA.. I think i going insane soon.

We are so close yet so far.

I don't really know what you actually thinking.

I thought I used to be the one who know you very well.

But not.

It just makes me sad.

No talk for 5 months. I donno how I did it.

I really wanna talk to you so damn badly.

Even though just some very formal topic.

P.S: I just want to hug you and say I love you. <3

Will you?

There were alot of chances to say hi to you today.
But I lost all the chances. I wanna kill myself so badly.

Haizz.. Bad mood.

What should I do? What should I do? What should I do?

I have no idea with it, I lost myself in a different world, waiting someone to help me.
But I don't deserve it.

My heart feel like aching when I answer NO to the question they ask when you came in my class.
I can't even catch up the teacher during my favorite Addmath class.
What The Hell. ><
I saw it. You stopped for awhile and decided to change another way to walk back to your place.
I don't know what feeling should I have on that time.
Smile? or being emo again.

I don't wanna be like that. I hate that kind of me.

Totally dislike.
What will you do if I asking for a chance again?
Feel annoy?
Hell yea, basketball is the best way to blank my mind.
But, you're in the court also.
I seriously feel like want to go and bang the wall now.
If you read this, will you give me an answer?
Although you already given me last time.
The heartbreaking-answer.

Disappear.

What If I disappear from this world, your world one day?
Not leaving contact way, Move house, move school.
Delete all the account.
That must be cool. Maybe no one will looking for me.
I can live in a whole new life, with new friends and new thinking way.
And maybe have a crush on someone else,
lost my mind, then live lifeless.
It sound sad.
Why mind must be so complicated?
If it is as easy as 1+1=2,
Will everyone still have to suffer?
Living with a smile, no more tears.
But it ain't not a life,
yea, real life should be full of complicated thingy and things to make you worry about it.
If not, what for God create us?

Whenever you having suffer time, just find a best way to solve it and let it be.
Time will past, pain will go.
Gain experience,
Live life, No regrets.

Long Gone and Moved On

When's the day you start again
And when the hell does you'll get over it begin
I'm looking hard in the mirror
But I don't fit my skin
It's too much to take 
It's too hard to break me
From the cell I'm in 

Oh from this moment on
I'm changing the way I feel yeah
From this moment on 
It's time to get real

Cause I still don't know how to act
Don't know what to say
Still wear the scars like it was yesterday
But you're long gone and moved on
But you're long gone 
But I still don't know where to start, still finding my way
Still talk about you like it was yesterday
But you're long gone and moved on
But you're long gone, you moved on

So how'd you pick the pieces up yeah
I'm barely used to saying me instead of us
The elephant in the room keeps scaring off the guests
It gets under my skin to see you with him
And it's not me that you're with

Oh from this moment on
I'm changing the way I feel yeah
From this moment on 
It's time to get real

Cause I still don't know how to act
Don't know what to say
Still wear the scars like it was yesterday
But you're long gone and moved on
But you're long gone 
But I still don't know where to start, still finding my way
Still talk about you like it was yesterday
But you're long gone and moved on
But you're long gone, you moved on

No I can't keep thinking that you're coming back
No
Cause I got no business knowing where you're at
No
And it's gonna be hard yeah
Cause I have to wanna heal yeah
And it's gonna be hard yeah
The way I feel that I have to get real

I still don't know how to act
Don't know what to say
Still wear the scars like it was yesterday
But you're long gone and moved on
But you're long gone 
But I still don't know where to start, still finding my way
Still talk about you like it was yesterday
But you're long gone and moved on
But you're long gone, you moved on

But you're long gone, you moved on
Eh eh, oh oh
eh eh, oh oh
But you're long gone, you moved on

-------- The Script <3 =)  

The lyrics are so nice and beautiful right for me.. =) 
I think i addicted to it adi. =D

I were nothing.

Sitting in a corner, blanking my mind. Let time bring me back to wherever it wants.
I walked in a world, watching everything happen like it happened before.
Feelings run and collide the wall of my heart. It feels pain, I can't recognize what's the feelings.
My tears fall down with no reason, all the image suddenly turns blur.
I try hard to let my sight become clearly, so I can able to identify the face of the people inside the world.

I saw a girl smiling happily when the boy is around her.
The boy do whatever the girl wants him to do just to make her happy.
The boy keep on giving and giving all he has to the girl.
The girl feel stress sometime, she scare she can't bear it when the boy gotta leave her one day.
The girl started complain, she say she wants freedom.
But she donno how much it hurt when the boy heard it.
They start quarrel, non-stop.
Another day, they don't talk to each other at school. Just like two stranger living in a same world.
The girl always looking at him in class, trying to get his attention.
She wants to talk back with him after quarrel happened between them so badly. 
But the girl didn't take any action.
The boy always the one who begging the girl not to angry.
And yea, they playing with each other again.
But time pass, the problems started getting more.
The girl has a lot of bad habits, the boy try to convinces her to change it.
But the girl don't listen to him. She just do whatever she like.
When the first time the boy hold the girl's hand, she got shocked.
The girl feel nothing but happy.
The girl love the way the boy hold her hand and hug her.
The boy started call the girl. They talk and laugh every night.
There are always a sweet ending before the call end.
But, jealousy may cause a fire.
The girl likes to play around with boys, sometime she feel more freely when she with boys.
Just like brother. No others.
The boy hinted the girl not to be so close with boys, but she didn't listen to it.
The girl thinks they are just like her girl's friends. No different.
But the boy not thinking at the same track of the girl do.
And, quarrel started again.
They felt tired. They tried to chase back each other but got nothing.
They didn't talk to each other after a worse quarrel happened.
The girl look for him at school everyday, but the moment the boy look at her, she quickly turn away and act like she doesn't care about it.
The girl feel disappointed after the boy walked away.
The same things goes on everyday.
One day, the girl send him a message. Telling him she do still care about him.
But the girl got a rejected answer.
The girl's stare at her phone for few minutes, the answer repeating in her mind again and again.
And finally, the tears drop down.
The girl delete the message that she received from the boy and,
the message which she used about 1 hour decided sent or not to sent it to the boy.
She hardly fall sleep that night.
And the relationship stopped.
The relationship between the boy and her worse than a friend, a stranger.
The girl still think of the boy everyday.
But the girl always putting a cold expression on her face whenever she saw the boy.
Just not to show out her afraid and sad feeling.
And thing goes on and everything just remain the same.
The girl dreamed of the boy sometime. She was happy that he finally talk to her with a smile the boy used to show her. But, everything turned black after the girl wake up.
Yea, It was only just a dream. The girl say to herself.

Raindrops fall down and hit the windows, only I realize it's raining.
I smile, but my eyes are full with tears.
And I found out, the girl inside the world,
Is me.

Think about It

Waiting, Thinking.

The first time I went to padang asam after something happened.
At first I thought he was not there, and I were making fun of Ming. =P
BUT!!! When I sit on the playground thingy. He was just straight in front of my view!!
Oh God.. I was like..>< I keep on mumbling, Ming only realized he sitting beside the court.
My brain told me to hide myself again. I can't control but followed it.
Yea, I know he din't wear his spec, so he won't able to found me.
That's why I felt comfortable after I calm down myself and walking around the court.
I walk in the court and play basketball with Pei Ling.
Me and Ming talked alot about HIM and HIM while sitting at beside.
I can look at him because I know he can't catch me while he playing basketball without wearing spec. =P When I told Ming about this, she laugh out loud.. hahahahha =P

If got a chance, can we get back together?

I'm thinking about it.

Yea, maybe I have no right to talk about this. But I just want to release my feeling in my own blog.

I realized that, my face expression change after I saw him.

Ming always the one who told me not to emo. Smile more.

I smile and my face turn no expression again.

I'm so sorry for that, I 'were' the one who make them laugh and smile.

But right now, I need them to make it for me.

Maybe it's my turn to make an effort. If I want to chase back the relationship between me and him.

But I scare that I just doing some hopeless thing. And, after that, I feel tired. I can't smile anymore.

I really scare of it.

But everytime I saw him, there's always a smile hanging on my face. Because my mind refreshing the scenes in my brain again.

The words he said, what he did flows on my mind when I think of nothing but him.

I'm glad that I met him. He created alot of nice moments in my life.

But last time i were just too self-centered. I rarely think of his feeling.

Yea. He felt tired. He choose to let go.

I can't say anything.

Any I have to keep all my feeling and words inside my heart. Forever and ever.

P.S: I donno whether there still got a chance to let you read this post. But, thank you very much for taking care of me. I just like a child who needed someone to look for me. And you did the job. Really thank you. =)

AWESOME experience! =D

wuahahhaha.. FINALLY! We went out at night. =)
This is the first time we hanging out at night! I hope we can still going out like this.
Night sky~ Bright moon~ Cold wind~
WoW!!! awesome! =D
We had our dinner at BBQ Plaza, a nice place if you love meat alot! =D
After dinner, we went to cinema and met Wai Neng.
At first we thought we are going to watch movie at 7, but due to some problem~
We change to Rio! =) Which is a nice movie! =DDD
Because of the movie started at 9:40, We had to walk around and wait for the time passed.
We took pictures at every corner of Sunway Paramid.
We posing here and there and all the people walked by us and glared at us with weird expression.
Hahahaha.. But! WHO CARES! =D
We spend around 1 hour to took picture, until Ming's camera was low battery. We force to stop! hahahaha..
AND! DENG DENG DENG!
Something weird and scary happened!!! D=
We all screamed like hell after stunned for 5 seconds!
When we reached another floor, we just ran out of the lift as fast as we can.
While we were walking to cinema, all of us were quiet and keep on thinking about the CP3 thingy, I think. Or kena scared by it already.
We Q-up for popcorn around 10 minutes. We were lucky. The movie started after we went in and sat down.
Rio is a NICE movie! Alot of awesome songs inside this movie. And all the birds are cute!
We keep on laughing during the whole movie! =) It worth the price. hahaha..
After movie, we went to A&W and talking about 'future'.
Emmelin and Ming were imagining their future wedding style~
Around 11.50pm, we walked to the main door and waiting for our transport.
And 12am.. everyone went back.
I really do LOVE this gathering. Although just 6 of us. =D
I wanna go out again!!! =D
P.S: Although something I predicted happen, but anyway, maybe it was good to happen.

If we ever meet again.

If we ever meet again, what would happen?

Good things, bad things, it just depends on yourself.

Maybe everything start again,

Maybe things just stay at their own place, no even slightly change.

If I can go back to the past, I really do want to change a lot of things and decisions.

A lot of sweet memories came up on my mind while I trying to pay attention in class.

I can't help but fall deeply inside the sweet memories.

The same scene just like a MP3 with a repeat button on, repeat over and over again in my mind.

I screaming to myself inside my heart, telling myself to stop thinking about it.

But it failed.

Smile freezing on my face, instead with a frowning face.

My friends started to ask me what happened,

And my answer always remain the same, 'Nothing'.

I want to hug a person tight tight. Can I?

A person who I really really do still care about.

Can you feel it?

I think no.

Because I don't dare to show out my feeling towards you again.

I scare of the answer you reply me.

It really hurt.

I don't think I can stand for it.

I am still who I am, but I changed.

Who knows.

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